you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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