Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
why do cheetos always look like penises
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
