I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize