I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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