I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
