we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
