it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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