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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.

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• (806): View more from Texas

  For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.

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• (707): View more from California

  He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.

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• (631): View more from New York

  Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital

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• (912): View more from Georgia

  Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.

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