but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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