your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
