OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
