we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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