community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
