Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Randomize
