And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Randomize
