I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
