I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
