Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
