Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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