He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
