Christians are straight up FREAKS
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
