I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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