HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i barfeds in our rink
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
