So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize