Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
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