I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
