"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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