I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
