hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i just had sex bonerless
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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