but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
