Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize