So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
