No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
