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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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