when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
