He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
