ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'd cum for enchiladas.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Randomize
