why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
