New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
