That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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