I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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