The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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