But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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