..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize