apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
You're like the curious george of whores
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
