Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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