can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
