3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize