I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
My vagina just clenched in fear
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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