you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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